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MOTIVATIONAL SONG

from the AMPERSAND EPs (Triple EP) by (Samuel)

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lyrics

my dad left me on a carousel when i was six
i found out later he was buying methamphetamines
my mom spanked on an elevator in front of kids
i heard her later on the phone laughing about it
my older brother used to lock me underneath the stairs
and still rubs peanut butter in my nose hairs
my best friend in junior high stuck a sign on my back
i never found out what it said but still no one talks to me
so i’m kind of huge mess now as you can see

thank the lord for imaginary friends
thank the lord for imaginary friends

Stormwater Calhoun
always texts me back
and he loves my joke about the neighbors at Chicken Shack
Lucy Dove Angel
is so god damn hot
and she lets me feel her up
like any time i want
Mick Lowrider Snackburg Longfellow Unifluxion
is the actual name of this one — isn’t that hilarious!?

thank god for imaginary friends

my best pal out of the ones i made up
is a dude named Cecil Turnip Truck
for my birthday last year he gave me an imaginary pigeon
that i used to send messages to an imaginary kingdom
but one day while i was least expecting it
i got an imaginary message
from an imaginary penguin chick
i couldn’t understand cuz i can’t speak bird
but me and Cecil couldn’t stop laughing!

so the moral of this song is:

fuck everyone who’s an asshole to you
cuz even in your head there are better things to do
you’ll always be better than your methhead father
and your gossiptrain mother
and your cocksucking brother
if you don’t sink to their level
and just chill with good old Cecil

MMM, MMMHMM!

you are important no matter what anyone says!
and you’re awesome too!
no matter what anyone says to you!

this is kind of a motivational son, I guess
so I hope it motivates you

i guess

credits

from the AMPERSAND EPs (Triple EP), released July 7, 2014

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~ what nothing sounds like ~

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